Void Manufacturing

“Turning and turning in a cell, like a fly that doesn’t know where to die.”

Job Stealing Robots

Posted by voidmanufacturing on August 11, 2008

Which one is the robot?

 

Thank heavens somebody finally came up with an entertaining and modern replacement for those boring old priests that used to preside over these crazy, antique, performance art spectacles. You know, the ones where couples legalize their love with a contract from the state. Look at the expressiveness of the red emoter lights hovering in the midst of its shiny, black plastic, empathy displacement screen.

I wonder what other tricks it can perform? 

More good uses for robots.

From the capitalist utopia of Dubai, where terrorists bank and celebrities shop, comes this eye-catching, high-tech, replacement for those pesky, old fashioned, human, camel jockeys. This charming little unit allows you to ceaselessly whip your camel without having to worry about any annoying human rights groups poking around and checking to see whether you are feeding your jockeys or not. Finally, oil barons and royalty are no longer shackled to limitations of some weakling, Indian, street urchin, you’ll never have to worry about your jockey getting too tired to whip with one of these, that camel will die from exhaustion before the batteries on your new jockey begin to run out.   Equipped with shock absorbers and GPS tracking systems, the jockeys are controlled by the camel’s owners from the sidelines. A mere push of a button sets its whipping action in motion. These bad boys will set you back almost $300,000, that would take a lead carpenter in Dubai about 45 years to earn, it would take an average laborer in Dubai more than twice that long to earn… Wow!

Q: I wonder if the camel can tell the difference between a robot whipping it and an actual human whipping it?  

 

Toyota’s “Violin-Playing Robot” belts out a tune at the Universal Design Showcase in Tokyo. While impressively precise, critics say the robot lacks a human touch. Scientists are currently working on solving this problem.

 Now here’s something for neglected people everywhere:

 Breakfast in bed everyday… woo-hoo! And notice the attention to detail: sausages, lawn clippings, one piece of white bread, and a bottle of ketchup… my favorite! Be sure to keep up with the  maintenance on your domestic server robot or you could end up with a couple of magic markers, a sponge, and a bottle of 10 W-40!

This surgical micro robot, only 2 cm. long, was built to work inside the human body. It can be attached to various kinds of medical devices like micro cameras, micromanipulators, various sensors and drug delivery injectors. Yummy.


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